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How to Handle Criticism

by Michael Corthell In my series on phobias I found much evidence to support my belief that the fear of poverty was far and away the number one fear for people. But another fear is right up there too, and it is one that will hold you back, and keep you from finding success. It will also cause you endless worry — if you let it. It is the fear of being unjustly(or justly) criticized — having to stand there and hear those judgmental words streaming out of someone’s mouth and then feeling stupid, rejected or even depressed. ''The trouble with most of us is that we’d rather be ruined by praise than saved by criticism.'' – Norman Vincent Peale How to handling it? I'll use myself and how I handle email as an example this time. I get quite a lot of email feedback from the people who read what I write and publish(or re-post). Much of it is positive and supportive. But there is also much criticism, and even nasty or ignorant attacks. It can be

[Healing] doesn't have to be hard...

The secret of a blissful happy life consists of practicing laughter, silence, breathing and meditation  

Reducing Stress: Breathe to Heal

Mindful Breathing  does three things; captures oxygen, provides focus and reduces stress. by Michael Corthell At a marina, not far from where I sit writing this article, a message is displayed on their roadside marquee. It says, ''EXHALE, You're Home.'' That says it all as far as our society's stress and health issues are concerned. People work, are all up tight and they feel that they cannot 'breathe' until they are on vacation. What has to happen is that we all have to learn to breathe mindfully to reduce their stress all of the time. It is best not to wait until you must control your breathing.  Don't wait until you're extremely stressed out, in a panic or an arguement before minding your breath. Be prepared through practice. ''Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.''    —L. Frank Baum, Author of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz Mindful, (controlled) breathing not only helps your body functioning

[Carnism] Love Some, Eat Some

  A sure way to judge someone's heart and soul is by observing their treatment of not just some animals, but of all animals...and all creation for that matter. The Village Vegan  Love of animals is a universal impulse, a common ground on which all of us may meet. By loving and understanding animals, perhaps we humans shall come to understand each other. Louis J. Camuti

[Time] is a wastin'

  Beyond Procrastination:  Front-loading your work, works best. “It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end.” ― Leonardo da Vinci

Leaving Procrastination Behind

by Michael Corthell We set goals, but then we procrastinate. We write a to-do list, and then don't follow through. This happens time and time again. Wow, what's the problem? Many of us are really good at thinking about and planning what to do, but really awful actually doing those things. Why is that? ''Do not put your work off till to-morrow and the day after; for a sluggish worker does not fill his barn, nor one who puts off his work: industry makes work go well, but a man who puts off work is always at hand-grips with ruin.''     ― Hesiod There are a thousand and one ways to be unsuccessful in life, but the surest way just might be procrastination. Procrastinators sabotage their own plans. They lay down stumbling blocks for themselves. They actually choose ways to fail. Twenty percent of people identify themselves as procrastinators. Procrastination for them is a lifestyle ― a very maladaptive one. About procrastination:

[Equality] of all lives...

“I am not an angel," I asserted; "and I will not be one till I die: I will be myself.” ― Charlotte Brontë, Jane Eyre The primary problem with our current culture is that while it honors merit, equality, and a level playing field, at the same time it also greatly honors those with wealth, power, and celebrity, no matter how they are achieved. “He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fk things up this badly.” ― George Carlin

In Eternity: Neither Male, Nor Female

by Michael Corthell While the gift of sex and procreation is a very important part of this earthly life, many religious teachings including those of Jesus say that neither of these will play a role in the afterlife (or the 'beforelife') because our souls and our spirits, which are the essence of who we really are as created beings have no gender. Our biological packaging is for procreation and gives most of us either a male or female gender assignment at birth, but it is increasingly recognized in the society today that not all of us fit neatly into gender assigned categories, either physiologically or psychologically. The truth is, that human beings are a combination of masculine and feminine energies (yin-yang balance). The physiological representatives of these energies is manifested in the hormone testosterone, and estrogen, we all have some of each in inverse proportions(normally). Generally speaking those who are male at birth would have more testosterone t

[Behavior] Fear: A 'terrorable' waste of brain power...

  “Do one thing every day that scares you.” ― Eleanor Roosevelt Fear can be useful you know. It doesn't have to shut you down... it can wake you up too!

[Escape] from Bondage

“Every form of addiction is bad, no matter whether the narcotic be alcohol, morphine or idealism.” ― Carl Gustav Jung The desire to escape from pain,  is what creates even more pain.

Breaking Bad Habits

by Michael Corthell Habits run our daily life. Pretty much everything you do is based on a habit you’ve developed at some point in your life. Some habits are helpful, while others can also work against you. Even worse – there are a few 'bad habits' that can have a negative, long-term impact on your capacity to live a fulfilling life. Everyone wants to be healthy, strong, full of energy and life, as well as happy. Then why do so many of us have habits that take us in the polar opposite direction? Because getting rid of a habit requires change. And of all the things we do in a day, changing is by far the hardest. The only proven and proper way to get ride of our bad habits is to replace them with good, health ones. Smoking, gambling, eating junk food, drinking too much alcohol, spending too much time on the Internet, and even sex. Some seem benign, like gaming on the Internet, or binge watching our favorite shows. But, when these activities disrupt our pr

[Life's Work] Step by Step(or inch by inch) Gets the job done...

“Why do they always teach us that it's easy and evil to do what we want and that we need discipline to restrain ourselves? It's the hardest thing in the world--to do what we want. And it takes the greatest kind of courage. I mean, what we really want.” ― Ayn Rand Making a 'living' isn't the same as 'making a life'.

Finding Out What You Love to Do

by Michael Corthell Deciding on a career may seem seriously difficult—it is a serious decision, but it doesn't have to be difficult. However, the problem can be in trying to match your aptitude and the skill-sets, to the right job or career. ''Communication—Interpersonal Connectivity—is one of the key factors in all personal and career successes.'' But, the best advice in this article, no matter what I write below is this: Do what makes you happy . Why? Because  research has shown that a career that you absolutely hate can be worse for your over-all health than having no job at all and being poor. So, by being very aware of what your 'likes' and 'enjoyment' levels are when planning a career, plus making sure that you factor in everything involved in deciding on that career, you can go a long way in ensuring your satisfaction. Let's take a look: The first step then involves three questions: What do I want? What makes me happy? Wha

[Persistence] Just do it!

“The best way out is always through.” ― Robert Frost Trees symbolize patience, your lawn: persistence. “Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan Press On! has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.” ― Calvin Coolidge

Success and The Power of Positive Persistence

Persistence and determination alone are all powerful. by Michael Corthell Persistence in the face of negative people. We all have to deal with it in our daily lives. Very often the very first thing we have to overcome on the path to achievement is another person's lack of optimism and enthusiasm. If I had to choose one quality, one personal characteristic that I regard as being the most likely to bring me success, in any field, I would choose persistence. Persistent determination: the will to endure to the end, getting knocked down ninety-nine times and getting right back up for the hundredth. "Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve t

[Recall] Did you forget something?

“The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.” ― Friedrich Nietzsche My driving interest in photography is that pictures capture a moment that’s gone forever, and impossible to do over....absolute uniqueness.  ― Michael Corthell “Scars have the strange power to remind us that our past is real.” ― Cormac McCarthy, All the Pretty Horses

Do You Remember? Tips For Improving Memory

Memory: the faculty by which the mind stores and remembers information. Something remembered from the past; a recollection. by Michael Corthell Almost all of us aren't happy with our ability to remember, especially when we want to recall someone's name, a year we did something or a place we visited. How about trying to recall an address? or a telephone number? the time of a meeting etc? Even people who think they have an excellent memory, complain that they forget things. Do you want a better memory? It's all about 'practice makes perfect' and staying interested. ''It is sadder to find the past again and find it inadequate to the present than it is to have it elude you and remain forever a harmonious conception of memory.'' — F. Scott Fitzgerald A memory is like money in the bank, you can only withdraw it if you put it there. Your memory is probably just fine. You may just need to take the time to learn wa

[Rest] Relax and be foolish for bit...

  Humans are created to create, therefore we can only find relaxation from one kind of work by taking up another -- even if that 'work' is doing nothing.

Rest and Relaxation: It's All About Downtime

Managing Rest:  Like time, energy is finite, but unlike time, your energy is renewable through proper rest and nutrition. by Michael Corthell We all like to go on vacation and there are some studies that recommend 5 to 6 weeks as the optimum time off per year.  The same advice applies to breaks taken throughout the day. Taking frequent breaks to increase productivity might seem counterintuitive/productive, but they're more important than ever in our modern working world of constant electronic contact. We're constantly checking and updating our email, Twitter and Facebook in addition to the other stuff we're doing, and we don't take real breaks anymore — we just 'cyber-loaf' by fiddling and diddling on Facebook etc. ''Concentrate all your thoughts upon the work in hand. The Sun's rays do not burn until brought to a focus'' ― Alexander Graham Bell            Mr. Bell makes a great point here about productivity:

[Dream] Hypnos, Pasithea and Morpheus Oh my!

  “You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.” ―  Dr. Seuss The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep. “There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep.” ―  Homer,  The Odyssey

Good Habits for Restful Sleep

"I love my bed..." by Michael Corthell Sleep. Something that comes to us as naturally as breathing—for some. Sleep is a very important part of our lives. It is one of the 'big three' of good health, the other two being eating right and exercising. ''There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep.'' —Homer If you are always lacking a good night's sleep you could be in danger. Not just because just you are groggy and foggy the next day. Chronic, long-term lack of good rest dramatically increases your chances of diabetes, depression, cardiovascular disease, and even weight gain. Try some of these suggestions, and you just may wake up feeling incredibly well-rested. Sleep is foundational so sleep on a good bed.  If you love you bed, you're all set. But if you don't and have to buy a new mattress set, make sure you spend the proper time evaluating it in the store. Some stores even let you try out a new mattr

[LifeWork] The 'Rest' of it...

“People rarely succeed unless they have fun in what they are doing.” ―  Dale Carnegie The true purpose of our lives? To make everything a source of enjoyment! “Life is more fun if you play games.” ―  Roald Dahl,  My Uncle Oswald  

Live Slower, Enjoy More AND Get More Done

by Michael Corthell There is much evidence today that slowing down your life can actually improve your health and your productivity, which will lead you a positive mindset that will increase your happiness. ''Time is too slow for those who wait, too swift for those who fear, too long for those who grieve, too short for those who rejoice, but for those who love, time is eternity.'' —Henry Van Dyke At the beginning of both the industrial age and information age it was promised that objects, and information storage would provide increased productivity for our society, meaning that people could work less and have more time to live a balanced healthy life. That isn't how it played out exactly. We had to wait for a new age—the much anticipated age we a currently entering—the Spiritual Age for that to happen. Why will this age be different? It will be different because of time, or the perception of it and mankind's realization that everything does

[Time] ...has come today

“Time is the most valuable coin in your life. You and you alone will determine how that coin will be spent. Be careful that you do not let other people spend it for you.” ―  Carl Sandburg Time flies and that's okay, as long as you're the pilot. “You get to decide where your time goes. You can either spend it moving forward, or you can spend it putting out fires. You decide. And if you don't decide, others will decide for you.” ―  Tony Morgan